Learning to be a leader is a lifelong process. It is not something you can learn to do simply by attending a course or reading one or two good books. It requires an understanding of one’s own strengths, weaknesses, developmental needs, opportunities and obstacles. An important aspect of this is the interpersonal capability to be effective in a leadership role. The following interpersonal competencies need to be developed:

Managing Effective Teams
Building and maintaining relationships
Developing others
Communicating effectively

Leadership is more than having a knack for predicting trends, a head for numbers, or years of experience to fall back on.

A good leader will acquire the right skills to manage and lead people:

COACHING

Coaching provides structure, guidance and support:

	Take a complete look at the coachee’s current situation, including assumptions, perceptions and beliefs about their work, themselves and others.
	Get feedback from others (direct reports, peers, clients etc) about the coachee.
	Assist them to set relevant and realistic goals for themselves, based on their own nature and needs.
	Make sure that relevant and realistic action is taken toward reaching their goals and give feedback along the way.

DELEGATING

Identify a suitable person for the task
Prepare the person
Explain the task clearly
Clarify and confirm the person’s understanding
Empower the person with the necessary authority to do the job properly
Monitor the person’s progress and give support
Trust that the task will be done properly
Accept others’ alternative approaches
Acknowledge a job well done

MENTORING

A leader is also a mentor who continuously teaches skills and imparts knowledge to do a job more effectively.

BUILDING TRUST

	Respect your direct reports. Respect is built on a mutual understanding that you and your employees all have a stake in the organisation’s future and success.
	Communicating with respect. Watching how you say something - and when you say it - can actually be more important than the message itself.
	Keep your promises. Use integrity to build credibility among your employees and to build staff loyalty.
	Communicate openly. The best way for you to build trust is to communicate openly with your employees. Be transparent in all your dealings.
	Listen to what they have to say. Listening speaks louder than words in conveying respect and trust.
	Acknowledge the positive. Notice the good things about people and talk about them.
	Value and respect others’ opinions and input. Ask instead of “tell”.
	Show your humanity. Share your mistakes, your hopes, and your dreams. Don’t hide your mistakes or try to find excuses.
	Empower your direct reports. Allow and trust direct reports to make decisions and to deal with issues without your permission.
	Build trust by employing people with similar values.
	Be consistent. It is very difficult to build trust if you are not consistent.
	Create a shared vision with managers and employees.
	Acknowledge that fear exist and take steps to reduce it.
	Reduce unproductive behaviour by being more specific about expectations, guidelines, and requests.
	Discuss all aspects of organisational life. Nothing should be ‘off-limits’.
	Practice collaborative decision-making.
	Challenge negative thinking by discussing a possible positive outcome of an issue and build action plans, including contingency plans.

COMMUNICATION

Living and working with others are communication-intensive activities. The better we understand what other people are feeling and wanting, and the more clearly others understand our goals and feelings, the easier it will be to make sure that everyone is pulling in the same direction.

MANAGING INTERPERSONAL CONFLICT

Leaders have to deal with conflict sooner or later. Conflict is not inherently bad. In fact, conflict stems from different viewpoints and misunderstandings. Since no two people view the world exactly the same way, disagreement is quite normal. In fact, anyone who agrees with you all of the time is probably telling you what you want to hear, not what he or she actually believes.

	Intention Intend to fix the problem. If your intention is to win, don’t enter into conflict resolution discussions because nobody will win.
	Blaming No "you" statements. Instead say: “I think” or “I feel” etc. It is easier for a person to hear: “I’m worried, because you are never late,” than “you dare you be so late!”
	Turn the tables Be willing to see the other person’s point of view. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Ask yourself what you would have done if it were you.
	Acknowledge Needs and fears Write down everyone’s needs and fears and address each individually.
	Be fair Negotiate. Compromise.
	Matching Matching is when you deliberately lower your voice. The other party will most likely lower their voice as well, without realising that they have just been calmed down.
	Be respectful Treat each other as equals and with respect. Remember you still have to work together.
	Listen actively Listening involves more than simply hearing the words, it also requires active involvement that includes understanding, acknowledging, and responding. To make sure you understand what the person has said, paraphrase what you heard.
	Keep emotions in check Take time out to calm down.
	Separate the person from the problem Do not become personal and keep in mind that long after you have said the words, the damage can still be felt. Attack the problem, not the person.
	Reframe Reframing means to reinterpret a statement or comment into a problem-solving frame. For example, "What would you suggest I do?
	Acknowledge Acknowledging that you understand the other person does not necessarily mean that you agree with them.

HANDLING DIFFICULT PEOPLE

	Be predictable. Opponents hate surprises, because they view them as threats. Be as clear as possible in your dealings with un-cooperative people. Announce your intentions and stick to them.
	Refer mainly to your own behaviour. Show your expectations in the way you talk about your side of the deal. For example: "I'm going to do my best to let you finish making a point before I respond."
	Phrase observations of behaviour you'd like to see changed as if you assume the other person wants to change too. For example, "I know you're trying hard to control your anger these days, Joe. I think you're doing much better."
	Reinforce small changes by praising the person. Reward all and any improvement.

LISTENING

Listen first and acknowledge what you hear, even if you don’t agree with it, before expressing your experience or point of view. Listen and give a brief restatement of what you have heard (especially feelings) before you express your own needs or position. Acknowledging another person’s thoughts and feelings does not have to mean that you approve of or agree with that person’s actions or way of experiencing, or that you will do whatever someone asks.

MOTIVATING OTHERS

A major function of a leader is to motivate others. There are approaches to motivating people that are destructive, for example, through fear or intimidation. These approaches can seem very effective in instantly motivating people, but the approaches are hurtful and only motivate for the short-term. Constructive approaches include effective delegation, coaching, mentoring, praising, discussing, asking for opinions etc. These approaches can be very effective in motivating others for long periods of time.

SHARING FEEDBACK

Be clear about what you want to say.
Emphasize the positive.
Be specific - avoid general comments and clarify pronouns such as “it,” “that,” etc.
Focus on behaviour rather than the person.
Refer to behaviour that can be changed.
Be descriptive rather than evaluative.
Own the feedback. Use ‘I’ statements.

Don’t use generalisations such as “all,” “never,” “always,” etc., and ask to be more specific.

CULTURAL DIVERSITY

Managing diversity is responding to the need to recognise, respect and capitalise on the different backgrounds in our society in terms of race and gender. Different cultural groups have different values, styles, and personalities, each of which may have a substantial effect on the way they do business. Rather than punishing or stifling these different management styles because they do not conform to the traditional white (male) management methods, employers should recognise these differences as benefits. Not only can diverse management styles achieve the same results as traditional methods, but a diverse workforce can also help improve the company’s competitive position in the marketplace.

By Elsabé Manning

back to Articles list »